What is it that you do?

The working universe is surrounded by a huge mystery

there is a type of job, on TV and movies, that stays totally blurry

As John Cusack in Being John Malkovich in his strange job at the 7th1/2 floor.

And what the hell is doing Chandler Bing except having his name on a door

or Edward Norton in Fight Club, who’s personal wonders has altered his job somewhat…

Or He’s just Not that into You, where a bunch of characters are doing God knows what.

We see all these people having offices, wearing suits and carrying papers around

But what on earth is their work? On that matter, Barney Stinson’s got some background!

But that said, I’ve got the same problem with my own father’s business…

I categorically need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.


 

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Motion picture * (science + prejudice) =

The portrait made of scientists in US TV series and movies is very nerdy,

Starting with the all Big Bang Theory crew where it’s pushed to comedy.

So either scientists are always geeks in America whereas it’s not true in here

Or it’s just a motion picture concept like musicians have to create a huge stir

In a Cheerleader who, herself, have to spend all her mind in how she looks.

Scientists, for their part, have to love and collect comic books,

be really annoying when one’s wrong in it’s elocution or vocabulary usings

and have huge problems in relationships with female human beings.

Even Tim Robbins, being a scientist in I.Q., cant’s see Meg Ryan with no stress!

I unambiguously need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Taxi Driver, a film by Martin Scorsese

In the USA there are subways, buses and all sorts of public transportation

But it looks like cabs are the proper way to move around, it’s almost an obligation.

The yellow cars are so omnipresent on the little and big screen

That anyone in the world, seeing those colored cabs, would know which country they’re in.

Carrie Bradshaw or Neal Caffrey with no cabs would have a problem,

Even to go to school, most Gossip Girls use them.

In Collateral, it’s the new office for a murderer.

So, I figured, I could always avoid unemployment being a cab driver

I would spend my days visiting New York and occasionally help people in distress.

I terribly need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Chocolate factories aside…

Since Charlie Chaplin Modern Times in 1936

Various movies evoked factories and mass production tricks

Starting with Flashdance, where our dancer is at first working for the metal industry

Wearing a splinter protection mask and a coveralls just before revealing her dancing body.

Then there was Joe versus the volcano with a factory extracted from a Tim Burton picture,

A place so shabby that we’re glad Joe decides to leave for an insane adventure.

Recently there was Super 8 where the factory equals death and drama.

Seeing all this, let’s say I’ll stay out of production lines. It’s more suitable for my karma

Because, let’s be honest, I’m nothing like a super dancer and not a huge fan of death!

I utterly need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Call me fatalist

I would love to live from my writing, let me get this straight,

But, on motion pictures, writers seem to have fallen out with fate.

Fortunately, Woody Allen gave them a chance with Owen Wilson in Midnight in Paris

But look at Anthony Hopkins in Shadowlands portraying a so sad CS Lewis,

Or at Emma Thomson in Stranger than fiction who got torn up between her heart and brain.

Even Anne Hathaway had to go to drama for Jane Austen in Becoming Jane.

One would think that, as a writer, Johnny Depp would handle it well

But Secrete window sounded less like Heaven than like Hell.

And don’t even get me started with Bradley Cooper in Limitless !

I truly need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Days of Yore

Of course my view of US work is scewed in many ways

Since I’m just referring to what cinema portrays.

One of the current bias is the days where movies take places.

Of course, on it’s golden age, I’d like to be part of Pan Am stewardesses.

I’m not sure being a sports journalist looks like Leatherheads’ Renée Zellweger

And I would be glad if they launched today a Mad Men’s secretary job offer.

Of course the Hollywood greater period made directing movies really tempting

But even without the Daniel Day-Lewis’ job on Nine, I’d be applying.

Too bad we can’t choose our century as well as the job we want to access.

I hugely need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Nothing suits like a suit

Fashion is not my specialty but is certainly something I care about.

And seeing people working in the US in movies and TV makes no doubt:

If I get a job there I will certainly have to wear suits,

I never seen a woman hail a cab in Manhattan not wearing the outfit that suits.

They already suited up in Woody Allen’s Manhattan,

They kept doing it in When Harry met Sally, well, at least it’s true for Meg Ryan.

Working in the Matrix certainly meant to wear classy outfits.

And it even became a lesson in which anyone should find some profits

When Barney Stinson got heartbroken and made it a rule of greatness.

I unquestionably need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

The tale of the miracle teachers

Teaching always looks nicer from the outside

And movies and series don’t help seeing it from the right side.

Wherever it’s from Mona Lisa Smile’s creepy-wify-girly school

Or from Sister Act’s religious establishment, that somehow got to be cool,

From the passionate boys class in Dead Poet Society

Or even the kinder garden class that manages to survive with How I Met’s Lilly,

There is always some miracle that never happens in real life, except after the word “Action”.

How many of you had A. Banderas teaching Tango while you where in detention?

Or H. Swank making you a writer when the only thing you read was the tabloid press?

I hardly can keep going without a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Cock-a-doodle-do

Since I’m willing to work in New York and I’m from France

I tried to figure out how the Americans see us and hence,

I looked up movies and series where there are french characters.

To sum up it seems you wouldn’t want to hire us as baby-sitters:

Melanie Laurent in Inglorious Basterds is no nice lady

And neither is Vincent Cassel in his role for Darren Aronofsky.

Sherlock Holmes movie shows it well with the role of Dredger:

A 6,5 feet high, and surely same breadth, french monster.

But then again I’m not looking to be a henchman, the pay is known to be worthless.

I remarkably need a catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.

 

 

Dial 911

In movies and even more in TV series, there’re always strong odds for catastrophes

There’s always going to be armed raids, criminal fires, evil twins and stole trophies.

Anthrax alerts are as current on TV as overpriced handbags at Macy’s.

A lot of these events tend to happen in workplaces;

Let me remind you the Grey’s Anatomy end of season six’ trauma,

Chuck’s Buy More burn down or Ally McBeal’s Billy’s Drama.

For mortal infections, House M.D., Alias, NCIS and a lot of films had their share.

We know it’s going to happen, they know it’s going to happen, it’s just a matter of when & where.

Nonetheless, there’s never a tryout evacuation, any exercise fire alarm… it’s such incautiousness!

I wonder what could be my catchphrase, everybody has one in the US.